Reply to yesterday

Thanks to manyofus1980 comment – “ahahahahahaha! maybe a leprachaun lives in your mind! x” – I had to share my reply with all of you.

I know there is one that likes to show up and take things from me and not return them for weeks , months, sometimes years. Things always disappear/reappeared on the 18th or 28th of the month. I think it’s because my granny found seven four leaf clovers for my birth – I still have them today, pressed and saved. I’m a lucky person for the most part so I guess he has to show up and make mischief to even things out. lol

You again!?!

When I was sixteen I was involved in many school activities that had me burning the candle at both ends. After many early mornings, lunches without meals, late nights and extra practices my body began to break down. First I lost a lot of weight, then my knee went out and to add insult to injury I found three grey hairs.

That was twenty-nine years ago, and guess what I just found?

Inherited traits

My parents came up to help us with some projects around our place. As the men worked outside, the women attended to the filthy layers of dog hair, dust bunnies and cobwebs that had built up since the beginning of the year – (when all the chaos started).

As we cleaned it became clear that both of us was OCD-ing and they were starting to clash. When I tried to complain about our disagreement she brought up a good point. If I was going to inherit anything I should be grateful it was the OCD and not Alcoholism – which runs rampant in my family.

I do a lot of drinking (non-alcoholic) when I’m depressed since I don’t eat – all my will to move is gone. It’s not healthy – it causes other problems both physically and emotionally for me and my family – who has to watch.

I’m glad I can’t handle caffeine – might as well as give me speed – I hate to think what alcohol would do to me.

Things that go bump

While scrolling through funny memes I was reminded of an event that happened when I was a teenager- my parents had taken me to see Phantom of the Opera for my graduation present, and I had picked up a shirt with the phantoms mask – I was so excited to wear it to school the next day that I had laid it over a chair so the design wouldn’t crease before going to bed.

In the middle of the night I woke up – rolled over and found myself staring into a pale face! Many thoughts ran through my head – had someone broken into the house, was I going to be kidnaped, what could I grab to defend myself, could I at least put on clothes – and that’s when I realized I was looking at my new shirt. The mask part was glowing and it looked like someone was looking at me in the moonlight. 

I don’t leave that shirt out at night anymore.

Form VS Function 

Our adventures in Karavaning have officially beat me to a pulp, I could hardly get up for more than two hours at a time before having to crash again. My body is trying to decide if it wants to seize up or give up while my mind is still running in manic mode. I know I have had times when my depression will affect my thoughts and speech but this time it’s because I’m so exhausted that the function is not there. My Mind is forming all the words and thoughts but it’s coming out in mumbled spats. They don’t even count as sentences.