Running Away

Dirk has talked me into this high mountain trip into the Unitas. I don’t know how I’m going to do but for kicks I’m bringing my GoPro. Maybe I’ll get the courage to show you something.

I have post set up to go till I get back on Wednesday but until then please keep us in your prayers. I’ve already had two meltdowns and we just got started.

Overwhelmed

I’m doubting myself and the purpose of this blog. I wanted to help others find the humorous side and now I’m deep in my own depression. In looking at my options it’s becoming very overwhelming and confusing. Am I really helping anyone? Have I connect with any of you? Do I have the right kind of site that can make a difference? Does anyone really care about laughter and happiness while being bipolar or are they all stuck in their own crises. I admit that since going down I haven’t been that involved in the outside world. In fact I have barely gotten out of my house, into my one acre yard let alone the rest of the property. Dirk is trying to talk me into going on a camping trip over the weekend and it’s freaking me out.

It hasn’t helped that I’ve also been overwhelmed by the prospect of updating my social media. I found out today that someone who started using my branding ‘Ramblings of a Bipolar Mind” after me is getting a better response than me. Now the thought of having to change and start over is making me sad, mad and annoyed!

20/20 hindsight

The past few days has been emotionally draining. Trying to get out what I’m thinking and feeling has been hard and I also had to deal with another manic issue- my mother.

It got me thinking about when I was a kid. My mom always said I wore my heart on my sleeve and was too emotional. There were times when I would absolutely flip and lock myself in my room until my mom would push her way in and sit on me.

It suddenly dawned on me that not only was I dealing with my own bipolar illness but was probably feeding off of my mothers manic episode.