You dog!

Today was full of excitement- must be the full moon- but I’m only going to tell you one story that happened.

My oldest is now living with us again and had a short work schedule so I allowed one of her dogs to stay home with my two. Percy, the tall -toothless- white borzoi is a good boy for the most part but I have had problems with him running into the highway  or off to the DWR property behind our neighbors house so when I heard horns blaring this morning I panic. I was afraid one of the dogs was in the road but I found all three dogs laying in the living room.

I relaxed and returned to making my breakfast. Toasted banana bread with butter. I had just replaced the butter when I heard more honking and braking tires. This was not good. I noticed that my neighbor’s cow from across the street had gotten free and was playing frogger with the morning traffic. I dropped everything and rushed out to take care of it- which was fairly easier than we thought it would be.

When I returned into the house I was greeted by an unexpected sight. Druid was laying in the living room licking the carpet crazily, Hickory was sniffing around, and Percy was standing in the kitchen looking guilty. Instantly I thought I had lost my breakfast to the three opportunist but the bread was still sitting on the counter. What was missing? The stick of butter – and when I tried to replace it – the culprit stepped forward and drooled for more!

I guess I shouldn’t be surprised- his mother liked to do the same thing. (aka- my oldest daughter)

Share the Bloody Love

Halloween is one of my most favorite times of the year, and like any bad seed, I like to mess with people, although I prefer to work on more lingering effects than just good ol’ scare tactics. Sure you can make people jump but for how long? I would rather instill a fear and allow their imaginations to create the nightmare. I guess having a mind that is overactive just makes me want to share that joy – Bwahahaha.

For those of you who also like to play mind games here are some of my recipes for disaster to trick your guest before you treat them.

SET-UP: in the dim light set up a tasting table. Give some creepy story as to why they are testing (witches/mad scientist/apothecary/etc.) and let the fun begin.

THINGS TO TEST: Head to your local grocery story and start looking for unusual things and textures then give them names that make it sound unworthy to taste. Here are some of my personal favorites that I have used through the years. If you have some that you like, please let know what they are and how they were received.

Spider Eggs Sacs – yogurt covert raisins
Bat Lunges – smoked oysters
Rotten Teeth – hominy
Bone Chips – water chestnuts
Maggots – canned mini shrimp
Demon Eyes – lemon heads or wasabi peas
Toxic Zombie Brains – cream cheese/sour cream/wasabi/avocado
Chopped Rat Tails – black licorice
Mice Brains – craisins
Mermaid Tears – tonic water
Dust of Broken Hearts – cream of tarter
Troll Dandruff – colored coconut flakes

Rebellion 

Our chickens have been running amok for awhile now and our Easter egg hunts have been fruitless so we locked them up in their coop last night. They were very pouty today since they couldn’t have free run of the neighborhood and when we checked later in the day to see if we had any eggs we discovered they had mutiny once again by eating their own eggs.

Dirk’s response to that, “Meats back on the menu boys!”

I forgot

I didn’t get to post last night because I was worn out from panicking over my missing dog. Druid, my cuddle buddy and help-mate disappeared for hours right before bed. This is not like him, he usually tells us it’s time to go up at night and if we are into a show will leave and go to sleep without us! There are two things that boy won’t let you forget- food and sleep! 

He returned home unharmed and ready for bed about 1 am. We have no idea what happened to him or where he was.

I remembered 

It wasn’t right off that it came to me but halfway through the day.

Yesterday morning Dirk made a great breakfast and asked me if I like the pancakes just as I was about to burp. It wasn’t demure- but a long winded bellow.

Me: No, that’s not what I meant- they were really good!

Dirk: You had me at the belch.

Funny Story

A few weeks ago our chickens started laying their eggs in wilds places – our neighbors pasture weeds, under the pine tree, under our deck – every day we got to have our own little Easter egg hunt because the heat had become unbearable in their coop. One of their nests under the deck is hard to reach and I wasn’t able to get one the other day. The next morning I came out to find that the hens had pushed the egg out for me. 

At least my birds love me!

My Mind: Or is this their way of giving you a bird?