Situation update 

I’m not to sure how I am right now. Here is what I do know.

I’m depressed. I have no will to do anything or I am so frustrated that I’m ready to blow up. My body feels heavy, slow and my joints hurt. That’s not including the dislocated rib and the cold sores. I can’t think or speak well. I’m sleeping more and pretty much feel like a blob, with no distinct feelings or desires. I can’t taste anything.

What I’m capable of doing right now.

Getting dressed for a few hours. Reading, Pinterest and YouTube. Maybe eating.

Too emotional involved 

I usually like to be more upbeat or comical but lately, I’ve been having a hard time. Recently my loved ones have been under attack and it hurts me to see them suffer. I start to feel useless because I can’t do anything to take away their problems. These are normal emotions but for those suffering from Bipolar Disorder, OCD and other physical problems it can quickly wear you down.

I’m not saying I need help or encouragement – although I will not deny I could use it – but that I understand.

We may not look sympathetic, or like we are paying attention because we are fighting our own internal battles of how to handle your suffering.

What they don’t Know

I have a new calling for the church – Compassionate Service Assistant. Today was my first time serving my calling – providing a luncheon for the family at the funeral. It ended up being most of the day for prep work, serving and clean up but we did have some free time, and I got to learn more about the sisters I now work with. As the day progressed, the ladies began to joke that I was still the newbie and needed to be corrupted.

They have no idea who they are dealing with! lol, But they did learn that I am OCD, as I keep trying to make everything match or even on the tables.